I've known Arnie King for four years and consider him a friend. It's no surprise that he has gained the support of hundreds of community activists, academics, and political leaders. He is a warm, thoughtful, and articulate man, with a friendly smile and engaging personality. In our group meetings, Arnie is always a source of encouragement and support. He has done his own difficult work and participated many times in group processes for other members and outside volunteers. In short, Arnie is a wonderful human being.

The more difficult question is whether, having violently taken a life without provocation, Arnie can ever earn or deserve his freedom. John Labanara's loss was forever. Why should Arnie's punishment not also be forever? In granting Arnie King Commutation would the Governor betray the Labanara family and their loss?

The mechanism for a Governor's commutation serves a worthwhile purpose. It allows men like Arnie King to strive for personal redemption in life. This benefits the people of the Commonwealth by making our prison facilities safer and our communities saner. By the strict standards established by the Pardons Board, Arnie King has earned his commutation.

My work in prison and with descendents of survivors and perpetrators of the Nazi Holocaust has taught me that there is a type of forgiveness that has negative consequences and another that is powerfully beneficial. Harmful forgiveness is a form of vengeance thinly disguised as an act of virtue. It occurs when the forgiver adopts a superior position, as in the 'good one' absolving the 'bad one' of guilt. Healing forgiveness is based, not on judgments about virtue and sin, but on deep compassion and humility. It restores balance through the offender's acknowledgement of guilt, expression of remorse, and offer of restitution. The victim's loved ones honor the loss by allowing the sweetness of life to be restored to the living. This forgiveness is made without airs of superiority or righteousness. It leaves the perpetrator with his guilt and dignity.

It is understandable that John Labanara's loved ones feel closer to him when they say, "Because you died so tragically, I will avenge the injustice of your death." His death might be better honored by Arnie King. Perhaps Arnie's work in the community can stay the hand of another would-be murder and spare the life of another random victim. That would be a more worthy memorial to John Labanara than having Arnie die in prison.

Arnie King does not need false forgiveness. Instead, what we all need is to understand that vengeance does not change the fate of the living or the dead for the better. What will serve healing in both families is acceptance of the past. That and compassionate acknowledgment of the existential equality of all people and the unknowable vastness of life.